Originally posted on Thought Construction:
A while ago I wrote about being like Conan the Barbarian. Act with resolution, passion, and do what you want. Be strong enough to be yourself and defeat all those in your way. Conan is noted for saving the day through raw will and strength coupled with insight and cunning. But I also realize Conan is a high watermark to… Continue reading Be The Weed
Spaceman Jones hits bong… “If you are going to insist on having a job then make sure that you remember to get as high on marijuana as you can before going in. To make the day go by faster, simply pretend that the customers are your best friends in the whole wide world. The most important thing you have to remember is to take lots … Continue reading Spaceman Jones Presents: The Stoners Guide To The Galaxy
It’s a fake magazine that is written by stoners. We get paid to smoke weed and watch TV. To be honest we have really been slacking off on the fake magazine part lately. But we have been very productive when it comes to smoking weed and watching TV. I would like to take a minute and give a shout out to our boss/editor The Pink … Continue reading So…What Exactly Do You Guys Do Again?
Humor me for a moment please and smoke weed, then listen to this song. The word hero gets thrown around a lot. Some people deserve to be called heroes, and some don’t. But today I would like to recognize a real life hero Howard The Duck! Howard arrived in Cleveland after being teleported to Earth while enjoying a beer and looking at duck boobs. He … Continue reading Howard The Duck A Real American Hero
Things are great. The fake magazine is running smoothly, gas prices are…who am I kidding I don’t know how much gas is. The important thing is we are having fun, and apparently we are upsetting Google, because they keep sending The Pink Panther threatening messages, and that is hilarious to me since The Pink Panther is a stuffed animal. I just concentrate on my official … Continue reading Old Skool Joe Is High On Life
It’s our theme music and every fake magazine should have some. A big shout out goes out to Big Mike The Mack…I mean Big Mike The Mothafuckin Mack; you have to say it together, because it goes together. He made the song, and he also has tons of other dope tracks. So check him out. People still say dope track right? I don’t know I’m … Continue reading It’s Our Theme Music And Every Good Hero Should Have Some
(Hits bong) Hey I saw this really good movie last night on Netflix. I think it was called Chef, it made me hungry also a little emotional. We cooked dinner like five times because of that movie, boy could that guy make a grilled cheese sandwich. (Hits Bong) Really good movie check it out sometime. I’m working hard today smoking weed and watching tv but I’m having fun. … Continue reading At The Movies With Spaceman Jones
Well…it looks like it’s time to get back to work. Step one smoke a bowl. Step two brew some coffee, have power breakfast with our head of security Goliath. Step 3 smoke another bowl ,and have sales meeting with The Pink Panther. He really keeps us motivated to smoke weed and watch TV to the best of our abilities and I don’t want to disappoint him. That’s pretty … Continue reading Smoking Weed And Watching YouTube With Old Skool Joe
Alright fine I’ll write a fucking article! The Pink Panther has really been riding me lately to write more articles. I keep telling him that I am not a writer I’m a stoner, and also a part-time janitor. Anyway so this is what I’m doing. I am smoking on some good weed and watching YouTube. I’m also getting paid, since I take a cut of … Continue reading Getting High With Old Skool Joe
Hits bong… “You know what’s a good show Blackish I’ve been watching that shit lately on Hulu and it kinda reminds me of The Cosby Show but with way more sex.” Hits Bong… “So like if everyone in the world is stupid…and I failed a piss test…does that make me no better than them?” Hits Bong… “Wait why do we keep passing weed to puppets and stuffed animals, … Continue reading Hits From The Bong With Spaceman Jones
